Friday, December 10, 2010

Life Ramblings

I really want to write a blog, but I don't really even know where to start.
It's the end of the semester. I need to get through a 15hr work weekend and 4 finals and then I can say I survived my first semester at Fredonia. To be honest, I really don't like it there. I had two professors I liked, I'm not really enjoying my coursework, and I really haven't made a single real friend since I started there. By the end of my first semester at JCC, I'd made at least five friends. It's so depressing. On days when my JCC friends aren't around for classes, I'm sitting alone, running the battery out on my laptop, then searching for an outlet to plug it back in.
With the exception of one person.
SMS is...unbelievable. We met online 4 months ago, discovered we had a mutual friend, and we each went to her for information on the other. hehe. We met up for coffee a couple times, and before I knew it, we were texting back and forth practically all day, every day. We went out to dinner at Applebee's, got some more coffee...and then life got in the way. We both got caught up in school and work and life, but continued to talk everyday, even though we didn't see each other again for a couple weeks. Over those few weeks, we had several conversations about life, love, and our futures, and with every text, we learned more and more about the other, and realized just how well we fit. We finally had a chance to get coffee again, and we sat for two hours talking about everything and nothing. Then, he texted me one lonely Tuesday while I was sitting alone in a corner, and surprised me so I wouldn't have to sit alone anymore.
He gets how it feels to be broken hearted. He knows how it feels to get dumped; to deal with a bad relationship. He isn't the kind of person who wants to push it or rush it in any way. He's teaching me the art of patience, and the anticipation is making it all so much more exciting. I'm clinging to this feeling because it's...the most amazing thing I've ever felt. He's being careful because he doesn't want to deal with another breakup. He wants his next relationship to be the last. He's not looking for a night, or a week, or a couple months. He is looking for forever. Forever is what I've been searching for my whole life.
He's smart and he's funny. He has goals and plans for his life. He keeps mentioning things in a way that makes it sound like we'll be doing them together, playing video games and going to concerts, and meeting my parents. I'm trying to be apprehensive; I've trying to keep myself from being excited. Because it seems like every time I get excited and get comfortable with something, it gets ripped away. But I can't help but be excited about him. He's everything I've been waiting for. And I'm perfectly happy to continue waiting and anticipating what is to come, because I just have this good feeling that we have all the time in the world to let this happen.
Life is being absolutely wonderful to me lately, & I hope it doesn't decide to crash & burn on me again.

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