Tuesday, June 15, 2010

in response to the question: "What would you like to say to your exes?"

Dear Emotionally Unavailable Ex,

Thank you. Thank you for teaching me the value of a heart, and for showing me nothing is worse than giving it away only to get it back in pieces. Thank you for making me finally feel safe; like I belonged somewhere, like I was worth loving -- and for making me strong when you snatched it all away. Thank you for every moment we spent laughing, talking, kissing and holding each other, and thank you for every tear I've cried since you walked away, because all those tears have formed a moat around my heart, encased like a fortress. The drawbridge is up and the alligators are biting. Which means that the next guy is going to have to fight to get to it. And while I know it will make future relationships much more difficult to be successful, I know that in the end, the right man will be the man who fought against all the protection that your actions caused me to create, and who never gave up, despite how difficult it may have been. He will be the man who is worthy of me, because he fought to keep me.

I will never regret our relationship or the time we spent together. I can honestly say that I loved you with all of my heart. You taught me more about love than I could have ever dreamed, and I wouldn't trade any of that, despite the pain I've been living in without you. I know that beneath the cold exterior and the angry words, is the heart that loved me, and the man I fell in love with the day we met. He's still there, and while part of me still hopes that you will find that man again, and in time, you will return, I know that the things that have happened since our goodbye will never be able to be erased, and that there will always be a distance between our hearts. I am sorry for everything, and I wish there was some way for us to bridge this distance and forgive each other. But the damage has been done. That will be my only regret; the way our relationship had to end.

Thank you for the time we shared together--the memories we created. Those can never be replaced, because they are priceless and impossible to recreate. I will miss you for as long as I live, because those pieces of my heart you handed back? Well, you forgot one, and now I am without it, because it is with you, wherever you go, despite all that has happened. Go ahead and keep it--I don't want it back, because even if I had it, nothing would ever be the same.

I wish you the best in life, and with everything you do. Even though you don't believe it, you are so talented, and have so much more potential than you think. You will do amazing things, if only you open up your heart and trust in yourself, and in the people who care about you. Stop pushing the world away, because no one deserves to be alone in this world. I believe in you, always.

Love,
Allyson

P.S. Id really like my shirt back. Thanks.

Currently Listening:
Breakthrough
By Colbie Caillat
I Never Told You

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